The Launch of Lunchlys

Breaking News/Intro:

In case you’ve been living under a rock (Yes, I’m talking to you Patrick Star), Some of the most famous Youtubers have assembled to produce a lunch box set to compete with Lunchables, a mediocre company that makes premade lunches that honestly, in my opinion, don’t look appetizing. I’d rather eat KFC. To tell the truth everyone agrees, as if two of the three creators weren’t already popular, but if they want to compete with Lunchables, what do Lunchables have?

Lunchables-Overview

To be completely honest, I was never on team Lunchables, either. They are pretty disgusting to begin with, being very artificial and full of science related stuff. In short, because Lunchables aren’t stored in refrigerators, they have preservatives to let it be resistant to germs, but also very unhealthy to our bodies. Man, I need some humor right about now, it’s been too long since. Hmm. More specifically, the main flavors include the “pizza”, nachos with cheese dip, and the turkey stack’em. The foods might sound fine, but they are really tiny, and the “pizza with pepperoni” for instance, is not even a pizza. In fact, it is a cracker with tomato sauce and bits of mozzarella cheese. The nachos are tiny round chips that are claimed to be too salty. The turkey and cheddar cracker stackers? Yeah, I think the meat used for it should be returned to the turkey, because it’s just Ritz-like crackers with thin pieces of artificial turkey and cheese between. The small size won’t survive my appetite, that’s for sure, but also they don’t contain enough calories, nor the nutrition for growth. But this also goes with Lunchlys, which begs the question. What ingredients do they have that are possibly better than Lunchables? Could it be…

Lunchlys-Overview

Sorry for holding the suspense. I’m going to be very precise here. Let me take a deep breath. (deep breath noise effect) Honestly, it’s the same flavors as the three main Lunchables flavors, but with Prime Hydration in place for the Caprisun and a mini Feastables Bar in place for the Crunch Bar. This is a bit of a giveaway, being a complete, full-on, rip-off. They even changed the names of the flavors. But sure, some parodies of movies and TV shows turn out to be good, so maybe Lunchlys could do better and good overall? That’s what we’re going to find out, by exploring the nutrients and that giant black and white label on the back that everyone ignores.

Calories Comparison

I know what you’re thinking from the last, last, section. Wait, calories? Aren’t too many people becoming obese, isn’t less good? Womp womp! That’s true, but according to nhlbi.nih.gov, kids 9-13 years old need 1400 to 1600 calories a day for slightly active children. (More for more active children.) Meanwhile, Lunchables has 260 calories for the turkey and cheddar, while Lunchlys has 230 calories. See where I’m going? Divide the minimum, 1400 calories by 3, you’ll get about 450 calories. This is the bare minimum for calories that should be eaten at lunch, yet, Lunchables and Lunchlys have only a slight more than half the calories required. In fact, kids that are less active and like to couch potato like Homer Simpson, will not eat enough either.

Protein

Believe it or not, (Believe it?) Lunchlys actually has 12 grams of protein for the “pizza”, but is beaten by Lunchables with 13 grams of protein, which is actually okay, because according to Cleveland Clinic Health Essential, a child aged 9-13 years old should eat 34 grams of protein a day, and 34 grams divided by 3 meals is a little more over 11 grams for each meal, close enough to Lunchlys and Lunchables. They might have won the battle with this one, but not the entire war.

Sodium

Now, we all love salt, especially on that juicy, medium rare steak, yet it can get unhealthy by eating too much, just like sugar and fats. The “pizza” from Lunchlys has 710 mg of sodium. Although milligrams are in the thousandths, the American Heart Association (AHA) recommends adults to eat less than 1,500 milligrams of sodium a day. First of all, 710 mg of sodium is close to half of this amount when in reality, this is the count for adults. On the other hand, children would, presumably, be less. If you, the readers, are still not convinced, then it’s because I haven’t listed the damage of sodium.

• Puffiness
• Bloating
• Weight gain

If you’re still not convinced, these listed above can do serious damage to your heart, bones, kidneys, blood, and a ton more, including:

1. Enlarged heart muscle
2. Headaches
3. Kidney disease
4. Osteoporosis-bone disease in which bones get brittle
5. Stroke-brain cells die due to lack of blood flowing, has more than 150,000 victims in the U.S in a year, securing top 5 most common death causes.
6. Heart failure
7. High blood pressure
8. Kidney stones-as the name suggests, a giant deposit is forced down the kidney, being unbearable
9. Stomach cancer

(I’ll need the back of a Christmas wish list to write them all down)

But it’s not just your body, it’s also mental health, too. Studies have found that eating too much sodium could result in higher anxiety levels.

The Drink-ZERO SUGAR Prime Hydration

Surprisingly, Prime Hydration has no caffeine, and is sugar-free, however, for those who know Diet Coke very well, it uses sucralose and acesulfame potassium instead for the sweet taste. They are also known as artificial sweeteners, and it is, of course, too good to be true, with the, “artificial” sticking out. Sucralose is bad because it causes inflammation, which is your body in defense mode when facing viruses and bacteria and happens by releasing chemicals. Usually, this is actually extremely good for you, but if it happens in perfectly fine conditions and goes on for too long, it can deal damage to your health, eliminating your own cells and even contributing to diabetes, cancer, and asthma, just to name a few. (Now that’s what I call backfiring) The same goes for acesulfame potassium, also having the side effect of gaining weight. Think next time before buying products saying, “Sugar Lite” or “0% sugar”, because they’re right, but not in a good way.

Conclusion

In short, take a look at some labels of food before begging your parents or taking out your wallet to buy them, and not to argue, some products are delicious and nutritious, but can harm you if you eat too much. This goes with sugar, sodium, and the opposite of calories. So the next time you look at that microwave mac and cheese, think about how this meal will affect your health.

 For more, check out Ishaan’s post for part 2 on the Youtubers on each side of the debate.